(no subject)

[zustifer]

In a similar vein to the almost content-free previous post, here's a link (about women feeling they have to 'look pretty') that sort of depresses me with its ostensible upliftingness. Like so many other things, I guess it's cool (the post) if it helps people, but, folks, we shouldn't have to say this. Looking nice/presentable is one thing, but always having to look at yourself in the mirror and ask 'do I look pretty?' must be goddamn hell on earth.
Also the comments are freaking me out.

Comments

[twillis.livejournal.com]

When I look in the mirror, I ask myself, "Will I scare small children?"

If, no, then, OK. If yes, then, Excellent.

[druidbreeze.livejournal.com]

One of my coworkers recently brought his small children to work. They were relatively outgoing, but wouldn't speak to me. In retrospect, it was probably the Wicked Witch stockings but I hadn't thought of it at the time. Says something about me that I was amused!

[ronebofh.livejournal.com]

I haven't looked at it yet, but this brings up something that i meant to comment on: a few female acquaintances have mentioned that they go through periods where they "feel unattractive". I wonder if men go through this, if it's a cultural thing, what. I'm occasionally vain, but i have never felt unattractive (i don't think i'm handsome, but i certainly don't think i'm unattractive).

[tongodeon.livejournal.com]

I *frequently* feel unattractive. If I've been working long hours, or sleeping poorly, or haven't showered in a few days, or am in a foul mood, or haven't done laundry and am still wearing decades-old "bart simpson radical dude" T-shirts. Conversely, if I'm eating well and getting some exercise and showering regularly and taking some "me time" to pick up a new shirt and some nice shoes I look in the mirror and think "yes, that's an improvement".

I don't think I *have* to look pretty in the sense that "I'll be dragged out of my house by the local constabulary", but I do think that "looking pretty" is an important and meaningful indicator of my self-worth, in the sense that people who are healthy and living well are worth more to themselves than people who are not.

[sanspoof.livejournal.com]

Hm, how exactly are we defining 'attractive'?
I guess I usually don't think in those terms as such; I would probably say something like 'I do okay, but I am not what-is-thought-of-now-as a hot or cute person.'
Men, I have no idea. You should post about it, I'd be curious to see.

[swinehund.livejournal.com]

And yet in most of your photos you look fairly cute. I know these standards vary (and I am usually creeped out by whatever look is fashionable), but it's easy to be misled by all the crap plastered on billboards.

I don't think of myself as attractive in the common way either, but I often seem to get positive attention in that regard from the sort of people who I want to find me attractive. That seems to be the important thing.

[sanspoof.livejournal.com]

Well, I also censor the most awful photos, and such. Might not be the best sample.

You are neat-looking, which is better than cute.

[swinehund.livejournal.com]

Wow, thanks! I meant that too for you, but like also in the, um, blank canvas sort of sense.

[unpleasant.livejournal.com]

What? Are you saying you aren't "amazed" at and "standing in awe" of such an onslaught of blog-bravery?

LOOK OUT, WORLD! Women were just told they can have children AND a career!

[sanspoof.livejournal.com]

IF ONLY WE COULD VOTE

[madeofmeat.livejournal.com]

I like it. Women who obviously spend a lot of time on their appearance actually freak me out a little bit. I don't want to talk to them. I might want to look at them, but I don't want to actually socialize. For me, poise is everything. A slyly cocked eyebrow and a pursed grin do more for me than push-up boobies or nice hair.

[druidbreeze.livejournal.com]

I think the reason the article is distasteful to most of us is that what they mean by "being pretty" basically comes across as "looking presentable in classic garments" and doesn't allow for differences in perception of attractiveness. And that one statement about wearing "unflattering" or "unfashionable" garments seems to suggest that you'd be more happy in unflattering clothing; thus, to be happy on a deeper level with your clothes, you (um) would have to be dressing in an unattractive manner? And plus. Hooray for stating the obvious, when it comes down to it.